PDW Hard to Kill Morale Patch

You might know me as a "water bear" or "moss piglet", and you know what else? King Kong ain't got nuthin' on me. I can survive in temperatures from -458ºF to 300ºF, go without food or water for 30 years, withstand pressures about six times greater than those found in the deepest ocean trenches, ionizing radiation at doses hundreds of times higher than the lethal dose for you frail humans, and even in the the vacuum of space (Are you screaming? Don't matter, 'cause in space no one can hear you scream homey).
  • I'm short and plump, with four pairs of legs, each ending in claws (usually four to eight) and will outlive you humans in the event of a mass extinction scenario due to astrophysical phenomena, such as gamma-ray bursts, or large meteorite impacts. You guys might kill yourselves off due to toxic pollution, rampant disease, famine, drought, civil wars from absurd political tribalism, cultural extremism, or maybe eating yourselves to death on bulk junk food. Whatevs, me, my sistas and bros will be the last ones standing. I am one very hard mutha f**cker to kill.
  • Specifications:

    • Height: 2.8"
    • Fully Embroidered Polyester Thread on Canvas Backing
    • Hook Backing with Cover